Hang Time in Sacramento
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by user Hogpage
The Sacramento Kings have signed Reggie Theus as its head coach. There are exactly three things funny about this situation.
1. He was the head coach of the Deering Tornados on the sitcom Hang Time (which aired on Saturday mornings on NBC).
2. He's coming from New Mexico St. Usually when your previous coaching experience comes from winning the WAC, you're next step is real college basketball, like the ACC or the Big Ten. Not the NBA.
And finally...
3. He was the head coach of the Deering Tornados on the sitcom Hang Time (which aired on Saturday mornings on NBC).
I mean c'mon Sacramento. You are telling me, out all the coaches out there, Reggie Theus, or coach Bill Fuller for anyone who was born after 1989, was the best the Maloof brothers, the all-mighty Maloof brothers, could muster up. Reggie? Sure, he did well at New Mexico St, who couldn't? It's the WAC. I hope I'm wrong because I enjoy watching Sacramento play. I respect its fans. And I love Arco Arena. I'm telling you right now, Kings fans do not deserve a bad basketball team for any kind of extended period of time. I just don't think Reggie Theus has the necessary experience to coach a team in Sacramento's position. Not to mention the fact they are members of the Western conference. The best conference of basketball in the world. (that is unless you have read Garnett to Boston, see below).
Sure Theus led New Mexico St. to two-straight winning seasons. I know they made the NCAA tournament, only to lose to Texas by 12 in the first round. I'm aware the Deering Tornados won most of its games, and aired on NBC, but that's only because the show was geared towards 12-year olds, and the writers couldn't bare to hurt the feelings of children that weren't even teenagers yet.
And it's not like I'm exaggerated. The only things I'm not telling you is Theus played 13-years in the NBA. He was actually pretty good. After being drafted by the Chicago Bulls as the 9th overall pick in the 1978 NBA draft, Theus averaging 16.3 points in his first year. Then 20.2 points in his sophomore year, and appeared in his first all-star game. Don't laugh, I'm being fucking serious. He made one more all-star team before being traded to the Kansas City Kings. Where he still averaged at least 18 points every year he played for them.
But he hasn't coached a lick. He took up acting where he became the head coach of the Deering Torados in a sitcom which aired Saturday mornings on NBC. The show was awful, yet very popular with children from the ages 8-14. That's why any young adult (maybe mid 20s and younger) will be laughing their asses off when they read of this hire). Seriously (puff puff).
Then, I left this off also, he was an assistant coach with Louisville under Rick Patino before accepting the gig at New Mexico St. That's it. Creighton briefly (again, Creighton briefly) recruited Theus when Dana Altman took a day to say, "Fuck you Arkansas!" And Creighton didn't even want the guy. Because when Altman came running home with his dick between his legs, Creighton said, "Fuck you Theus!"
And that's the extent of his coaching career.
So, I just don't see the rationale in this hire. Look how awkward his resume looks,
Reggie Theus 10/13/1957
Objective: To obtain a position as head coach of the Sacramento Kings.
Previous experience: Head coach Bill Fulmer, Hang Time, NBC Head coach at New Mexico St.
And it would just be up to Reggie if he wanted to include the humble experience of being a commentator on the NBA Live 2000 video game.
So again, I ask, why Reggie? Maybe it's cause he has the personality and the youth to relate to an inexperienced Sacramento team. Maybe it's cause of his great track record as a player.
Again, I hope he turns that team around. Because its fans deserve a winning team.
