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Contest: Best Cheesy Sports Joke

12
Vote

by user DNL

Here are the rules:


1) The joke has to be about sports.

2) The joke should be original, although I realize that you may have come up with the joke independently.

3) The joke has to be corny/cheesy.

I'm leaving the one I came up with in the comments. You should too.


Enable Comment Auto-Refresher
DNLLegend
483 days ago
Score 9+-
Q: If Garciaparra took his wife's last name, what would he become? A: Jewish!
Permalink | Reply
Anonymous Fanatic #1
483 days ago
Score -3+-
Mia Hamm is jewish?
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DNLLegend
483 days ago
Score 0+-
No. But that would make for the world's easiest conversion process.
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ChristofMVP
483 days ago
Score 0+-
?
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BigPPupMajor Leaguer
483 days ago
Score 0+-
...shaking my head....
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Anonymous Fanatic #2
483 days ago
Score 0+-
Huh? Don't get it?
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DNLLegend
483 days ago
Score 4+-
"Nomar Hamm" Sheesh.
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BigPPupMajor Leaguer
483 days ago
Score 0+-
Seriously that joke could not have been that difficult to get. Sadly I do have to give Dan credit it was clever and funny
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TylersaltAll-Star
483 days ago
Score 0+-
I got it, DNL. Nice job.
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Anonymous Fanatic #3
482 days ago
Score 0+-
it doesn't make sense to me even after reading the punch line.
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Anonymous Fanatic #3
482 days ago
Score -1+-
I am not smart but did finally understand it. And that my friends is the absolute most unfunny attempt at a joke. Ever.
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Manny StilesAAA-er
482 days ago
Score 1+-
I think it's funny that you didn't get it... does that count?
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PeanMajor Leaguer
483 days ago
Score 0+-
Q: Who is the most real baseball player? A: Ryan Foooreaaaaaaaaaaal
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BigPPupMajor Leaguer
483 days ago
Score 1+-
Wow... Im cringing thinking that you two actually sit around all day and come up with this stuff. Some how I dont think this is a one time thing for you guys.
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PeanMajor Leaguer
483 days ago
Score 0+-
ive actually had that one for a few years now. I always make sure to get him on my fantasy team so i can say my team is "For reaaaaaaaaal"
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BigPPupMajor Leaguer
483 days ago
Score 1+-
Well as long as you have a solid plan to win the league is what really matters.
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ChristofMVP
483 days ago
Score 6+-
Q. What is the difference between married men and the Philadelphia Flyers? A. Married men score on occassion.
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PeanMajor Leaguer
483 days ago
Score 6+-
heres an awesome joke thats been around since the 60's
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False ProphetAll-Star
483 days ago
Score 0+-
ouch. You just going to sit there and take that Dan?
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False ProphetAll-Star
483 days ago
Score 1+-
Pean, that was almost as bad as thinking this joke can win the World Series
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PeanMajor Leaguer
483 days ago
Score 2+-
Q: How many Mets fans does it take to change a lightbulb in the armchairgm office? A: not enough, because they are still in the Yankees shadow!
Permalink | Reply
Manny StilesAAA-er
483 days ago
Score 1+-
Go Devil Rays!
Permalink | Reply
False ProphetAll-Star
483 days ago
Score 0+-
best joke yet: The Devil Rays will win 60 games this year.
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Manny StilesAAA-er
483 days ago
Score 2+-
and another 30 on top of those first 60!
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False ProphetAll-Star
483 days ago
Score 0+-
ManRays, that joke is so rediculous it isn't funny
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Manny StilesAAA-er
483 days ago
Score 1+-
Q. How many Yankees fans can count to 27? A. At this rate, we may never know!
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Manny StilesAAA-er
483 days ago
Score 3+-
Q. If a Yankee fan and a lawyer fell out of a plane at the same time without a parachute, who would hit the ground first?

A. Who cares!

(Do I know how to make friends around here or what?)
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JB82Div-I Stud
481 days ago
Score 1+-
You sure do...
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ChristofMVP
483 days ago
Score 2+-
Q: What does Charles Barley and Steve Nash have in common? A. They were both ringless in Phoenix.
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Manny StilesAAA-er
483 days ago
Score 0+-
were...
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Manny StilesAAA-er
483 days ago
Score 2+-
Q. What's the difference between Derek Jeter and a person with no limbs? A. About .005 in fielding percentage and fewer throwing errors
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ChristofMVP
483 days ago
Score 2+-
Q. Will the Devil Rays make the World Series in 2007? A. Yes, as long as they buy a ticket to the games.
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Manny StilesAAA-er
483 days ago
Score 1+-
this coming from a PHILLIES fan...
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ChristofMVP
483 days ago
Score 1+-
At least I am not a Pirates fan.
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Manny StilesAAA-er
483 days ago
Score 7+-
A-Rod meets God. God is about to show the wonders of heaven to A-Rod including the really odd entrance at the pearly gates. Outside the gates, A-Rod sees Jason Giambi chained to a gnarled, fat, hairy, disgusting, wretched and scab-covered woman in a bikini.

A-Rod is repulsed and he asks God, "What's that about?"

God tells A-Rod "Jason used PEDs and he needs to pay his dues before I'll let him in heaven". A-Rod figures, 'You're God', I won't argue..."

So they get closer to the gate and A-Rod spots Mariano Rivera. But he's chained to an even nastier, smellier and disgusting (barely) female with scars and acne, just NASTY. A-Rod says to God "Wow! She's even nastier" (as he holds back the puke) "than the thing Giambi was chained to, what's the deal?"

God says "Well, Mo made a pact with the devil to learn his cutter, so he has to pay even MORE dues before I'll let him in heaven". A-Rod was just bewildered!

They get really close to the gate and there's Derek Jeter, chained up too. But he's chained to Scarlett Johannsen! A-Rod says "God, Giambi got chained to a beast for PEDs, Mo got chained to a ghoulish being for dealing with the devil, and Jeter gets chained to Scarlett???!!?? Jeter must've never done ANYTHING wrong, eh?"

And God explains, "Well, Scarlett has to pay HER dues, too..."
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Manny StilesAAA-er
483 days ago
Score 0+-
this is a "version" of a joke told to me by the late, great John Vukovich MANY years ago...
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ChristofMVP
483 days ago
Score 1+-
Manny, why haven't you wrote an article in honor of Vuk yet?
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ChristofMVP
483 days ago
Score 1+-
wrote should be written. My Philly tongue is shown off once again. :)
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Manny StilesAAA-er
483 days ago
Score 1+-
Man, it's hard for me to do a Vuk article. I only met him twice (at "Old Timers" banquets) and he was a joke MASTER. I would say 4 of the 10 funniest jokes I can recall were told by him. He was such a great individual regardless of baseball. And my words wouldn't capture his essence properly. Jason Stark nailed it with his article...


I did slap a remembrance fanbox on my page

† John Vukovich fan.
R.I.P. Vuke
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Manny StilesAAA-er
483 days ago
Score 0+-
now I'm sad... =(
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ChristofMVP
483 days ago
Score 1+-
A Song (music from the Seven Dwarfs)

Hi Ho Hi Ho

I'm off to the game I go

With razor blades and hand grenades

Hi ho!
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ChristofMVP
483 days ago
Score 0+-
And if you want your co-workers to think you are nuts, change the words "the game" to "work" and sing it every morning as you enter the office. :)
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TylersaltAll-Star
483 days ago
Score 4+-
An oldie but a goodie...

What do you call 25 guys sitting at home watching the World Series?

The New York Yankees.
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Manny StilesAAA-er
482 days ago
Score 1+-
Why talk about the Cubs when we can talk about actual baseball?
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JB82Div-I Stud
481 days ago
Score 2+-
What's do the New York Mets and Michael Jackson have in common? They both wear a glove on one hand for no apparent reason.
Permalink | Reply
JB82Div-I Stud
481 days ago
Score 0+-
You can also substitute "Boston Red Sox" if you wish...
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Manny StilesAAA-er
481 days ago
Score 0+-
The original joke was Bill Buckner...
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False ProphetAll-Star
481 days ago
Score 2+-
Q. What do you call a Suns player with a NBA Finals ring? A. A theif.
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Manny StilesAAA-er
481 days ago
Score 0+-
Q. What do you call a joke that's not funny?

A. False Prophet's

(I before E except after C)
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False ProphetAll-Star
481 days ago
Score 0+-
so what, I had a spelling error. It's no less funy that some of the other jokes. you just don't like it because it's about your suns.
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Manny StilesAAA-er
481 days ago
Score 0+-
That's true; it couldn't POSSIBLY be less funny than 'not funny', eh?
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False ProphetAll-Star
481 days ago
Score 0+-
it's worth some humor (albeit next to nothing, but still). As are most of the jokes
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Retrieved from "http://www.armchairgm.com/Contest:_Best_Cheesy_Sports_Joke"

This page was last modified 19:26, 7 April 2007. Content is available under the GFDL.

Categories: John Vukovich fan | Opinions | Opinions by User DNL | March 29, 2007

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