At a LOSS for Words, Darn those Sox
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by user Ron Sen, MD
The Red Sox entertain the Wild Card pursuing Chicago White Sox tonight at Fenway Park. The Chisox are locked in a struggle with the Minnesota Twins for the final AL playoff spot.
Along with the four dollar waters, the Sox must be handing out 'No-Doze' and Jolt Cola. But why? They could probably have paid for a new 'Sleep Laboratory' to help finance whatever the coming offseason seating addition will be.
Tonight's action generated so much excitement that they not only showed a concession contractor asleep in the runway, they had sideline announcer Tina Cervasio wake him up and interview him.
At least when Sean McDonough was the announcer, they had the courtesy or humility to flash an 'Inane Banter' bulletin.
Aside from the 'wicked' beating the White Sox have dished out, we've learned a lot. Jose Contreras has one of the best forkballs in baseball. If I had a nickel for every time they've told us, I could retire. Jerry Remy will be at the Red Sox Hall of Fame dinner along with Walt Hriniak, he of the helicopter swing, the hitting coach who helped Dwight Evans and wrecked Rich Gedman. Remy has 200 'guests' of Remdawg Nation in the bleachers. Remy is also sponsoring a contest for a cruise to Aruba on his website.
Did you know that Jerry Remy has a website, www.theremyreport.com? If you've watched the Sox before, I've dubbed the Remy promos for his website and Hot Dog stand the Remy 'Pitch Count'. Tonight he's challenging the Sox staff.
Craig Hansen has a radio controlled 'monster truck', as do some of the other players, who hope to race them. They showed Hansen crashing his truck pregame, which wasn't so different than the Red Sox stretch drive.
Leigh Montville, formerly of the Boston Globe and Sports Illustrated will be the latest writer to guest luncheon at Fenway Park.
Excuse me, I need a nap.
Date
Wed 09/06/06, 5:00 pm EST
